Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Below the Law

Hiiii.

This is my first post in a year because I've been busy. Billing lots of hours, commuting and somehow managing to make another baby. Since I'm on maternity leave for 2 months, I can blog again! Whoever said maternity leave was not a vacation??

Ugh. Maternity leave. I will be going back after 9 weeks, though I am at the midpoint of that now and already thinking of asking for another week. It's unpaid anyway, and! I no longer have an office, so I'm thinking this shouldn't be a problem. (For work, that is; for me, well, can you pay your mortgage with a credit card?) Can you believe that our legal assistant said to me in an email: "I'm not sure if anyone told you, but I had to move all your stuff from your office for the new attorney, and you will have the conference room until we move into our new space." Ah, no, no one told me.

I left work on a Friday like everything was normal, started leaking fluid that day and was put on bed rest, so worked from home the following Monday and then had a baby on Tuesday. I didn't even have the opportunity to take any personal crap away first. I'm pretty sure my assistant could handle finding tampons in my drawer, but ovulation predictor strips? (Just kidding, I threw those away on a late night months ago.) As far as things I don't want others to see, I can only think of one piece of paper on which I wrote some notes for my annual review, but still. It feels compromising to have someone move all your things, completely without your knowledge.

Let's interrupt this bitch fest to show this:
My Eve! A girl--I'm thrilled!
Back to our regularly-scheduled programming:

I'm already pissed about work for numerous reasons, but mainly because the benefits are below market and are frankly appalling for someone who has a job like mine. None of the details are really worth blogging about, but then add the conference-room-as-office thing on top of it all. Suffice it to say that I am not feeling hopeful about the transition back to work. I don't think I will be ready to return to commuting and billing a lot of hours and not sleeping through the night and where the hell will I pump, by the way? (Thank god, there's actually a law about that, that actually applies to my firm.)

Oh man, we wonder why women are underrepresented in management, as law firm partners, etc. Really? Because having kids while working sucks! I'm not even actually working right now and it sucks! OK, I am sad now and am going to watch paternity results on Maury Povich while eating M&Ms by the handful until Eve wakes up. When I sit with her I will be happy again--just look at that face! (see above)

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